what do you call a guy that has a mouth, but cannot speak? a poor freshman who has been commanded by a Senior not to speak.

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knock knock, whos there? the repo man.

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Why haven't the Miami "Big Three" won a championship together? They don't play as a team. They rely on three people to score all their points when there are at least two other people on the court at all times. They jinxed themselves because they thought they were going to win every title until their contracts were up.

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas

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Did you hear the joke about Hellen Kellers dad? It was very funny

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How do you make someone cry Take all of their belongings

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your mother is so fat that she eats a lot of high fat foods.

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is your refrigerator running? yeah oh, ok. just making sure your food doesn't spoil

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Why couldn't the plane fly? The pilot was a muffin.

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Why did the boy drop his Ice cream? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him.

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A guy walks into a bar. Yep.. that's it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road To get to the other side

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if she is old enough to bleed, she probably wears tampons.

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Knock knock Whoes there? ...

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

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What do you call a dolphin on a unicycle? You need medical help

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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Why was 1 afraid of 2? Because 234!

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How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

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A elementary school child was waiting at the bus stop for the bus to come. All of the sudden, the bus comes around the corner, pulls up, stops and he gets in.

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How did the boy die? Because he got molested and raped by a pedophile!

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The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't rape, which her sister had experienced while traveling in 2007.

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My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

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Sarah Palin, George Bush Jr and Glenn Beck are having a massive orgy with an illegal mexican immigrant, a member of the NAACP and an empathetic selfless homosexual democrat...no condoms were used because only felatio and cunilingus was being performed...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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