Why was the baby crying? He saw a black guy

Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

A seal walks into a club and gets hammered.

what do you do if you see an asian trip on a step? help him/her up and ask if their alright.

Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She got shot.

What did one ear say to the other ear? Did you hear that?

What did the bartender say to the bugatti owner? "Don't drink and drive"

Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

Q: "What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?" A: Dr. Dre

What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding? Nothing

Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

two black guys are in a car. Whose driving? The question is too broad. Either one of those men or unmentioned people could be driving the car.

I saw a butterfly yesterday with no wings so I poured some red bull on it and BAM! it drowned.

Why did the blonde kill herself? She was diagnosed with major depression and was dealing with a lot of traumatic events in her life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a bus.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? By grounding her.

Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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