Oh. So his name's Brandon.

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What's the difference between Hitler and shit? Shit has a shower in the morning.

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Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

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Why is 6 afriad of 7? because 7 killed 8 with a pistol and is now on a killing spree.

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Whats the worst part of having a Birthday on Feb. 29th? You only get facebook birthday wishes every 4 years.

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There is a bird and a squirrel in a tree. Later, as a farmer walked past, the squirrel ate the bird.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet. You guys really suck at making poems...

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What did timothy say after he went to go golf? - I just went golfing

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yo mamas so ugly she makes blind children cry

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So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

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What do a ginger kid get for christmas ? it dusen't matter... gingers don't have souls.

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knock knock

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Why did the man run? Because he was trying to get a gold medal for the 200m at the Olympics.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange WHO? Knock knock? WHO'S THERE?! Orange Williams. Sorry, I suffer from debilitating OCD.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

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What's worse than finding Michael V. in your class? Finding Curtis W. in there instead\

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What did the prostitute get after sex? Syphilis... she got syphilis

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch."

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Thanks

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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