Wy was the lamp crying, because his mother turned into mashed potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Doctor doctor, I came here as quickly as possible, it was just the nearest place I could find. My dog he... he's panting and bleeding and I don't know what to do I think he's dying and I just want him to hold on... Please... Well then go to a vet you stupid shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what do u call a gay bird a gaybird

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? In a desperate, but unsuccessful attempt to save his mothers life, as a serial killer pulled her into his van

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Yo momma's so dirty that she washes her hands with anti-bacterial soap.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you get a black person to drop chicken? Yell KKK.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats worse than finding bubba in your house? Getting raped by a rabid racoon..

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why couldn't the girl brush her hair? Because she had leukemia

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Weiner

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why didn't the blind girl say hi to anyone? Because she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Wieners? A: Nothing. your last name is a male sex organ

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What has wings and flies at night? A black man with wings

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man opens his sock drawer, grabs his socks and puts them on.........He dies 5 minutes later.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says, "I'd like some H2O" The second says "I'd like some H2O as well." Nobody dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Umm Q Umm 69 Best one ever

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A Jew, an Atheist, and a Muslim walk into a bar. They each drink a bottle, have a conversation, and leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why'd the women leave the kitchen? her chain broke

thumb_up thumb_down +7

DOWN

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Juggling lions and breast feeding.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

iPhone's. Amirite? That's not even an anti-joke. Just a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops