What do you call a dolphin on a unicycle? You need medical help

Why did the chicken cross the road To get to the other side

What did one German man say to the other? Wo ist das Badezimmer?

Justin bieber is a loser! One Direction all the way baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<3

What do you tell the woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

Why did the cop not arrest the driver? The Driver shot him 2 minutes earlier.

How many monkeys can play COD at once? It depends on how many controllers you have.

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

Bake until golden at 375

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Nothing because saying a fish can talk is like saying Obama is a good president.

?ti saw won troffe eht htrow t'nsaw yllaer siht

*knock knock "there's a door bell"

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Are you from Tennessee? Because I can tell by your accent.

Why is there milk on the stairs? Did the cow leak again?

Does it not sound kinda fun to keep slapping someone that always turns the other cheek?

this sentence will not monkey banana pie

What is black, has either black or yellow stripes, and cannot climb trees? A parking lot.

A Priest, a Minister, and a Rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "What is this, a joke?"

What's white or grey or brown or green or black or yellow or purple ? Could be almost anything, really.

Why do policemen wear belts? To hold up their pants.

I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

How many prostitutes do I have to kill in order to get an erection? Three.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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