a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman walk into a bar. they all wish me happy birthday bearing gifts. except there's no rabbi. or priest. or shaman. I'm not in a bar. I'm in my room. alone. i spent most of my birthdays that way.

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A kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans them up? A bear.

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patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

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Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

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A Weight loss service that works

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

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What's black and white and red all over A nun falling down the stairs

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Someone said you sound like an owl Who?

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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How Long Is A Chinaman's Name

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

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Okay, then I am taking the last comment back then.

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What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

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What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

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What do you call a black guy with a gun? A soldier.

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KSI

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Yo momma is so fat... Her body mass is above average.

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Doorknob.?/111111!!!!hrfuasdyfgasdkhfgawihbrtpaeyrgfai;yegf;gtf L Like or I will killl you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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what did the ninja say to the watermelon nothing that was chuck norris's watermelon

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69

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Dear diary, its day 230, the apple supply's are running low, the doctors are closing in, the dentists have been chanting "its time to go to the dentist" all day, I wont be able to hold them back much longer, help.

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Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang-rape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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