Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

Why did the chicken cross the road ? Possibly because it saw some sort of reason to do so, and being a chicken. Doesn't see the danger in motor vehicles.

What's an Animal? A natural periodic state of rest for the mind and body, in which the eyes usually close and consciousness is completely or partially lost, so that there is a decrease in bodily movement and responsiveness to external stimuli. During sleep the brain in humans and other mammals undergoes a characteristic cycle of brain-wave activity that includes intervals of dreaming. ... are you retarded? yes how did you know?

Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

A labrador, a chihuahua, and a great dane walk onto a bar. They are strays and were brought to the pound where they were more than likely put down or adopted.

why didn't the food in your microwave warm up ? because you didn't press start.

Knock Knock Whos there? Me Me who? Oh sorry forgot you had alzheimers :/

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

I black guy was walking down a street when he saw a beautiful women and said to her that she looked lovely

Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Ah, come in!

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The colour of their skin.

What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

What is worse than finding 4 worms in your apple 3 holocausts the 4th worm would be dead after 3 holocausts

Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

A man heard a thundering sound. It was thunder.

Don't look! I'm naked! No, seriously! I'm naked!

Q: What did one raccoon say to the other? A: We do not know, as raccoons do not speak any human language. And no human being can understand or communicate with one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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