A robot walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "can I get you a drink?" The robot replies, "No, I'm a robot."

What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

Whats the difference between boyscouts and jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

A priest, a rabbi and an imam walked into a bar and had a great time because all of them worship the same God. (Obs: The imam ordered only soft drinks)

A six foot chicken, a horse, and a muskrat walk into a bar. They are then detained by animal control and the bar undergoes a thorough cleaning.

What did the Jew get for Christmas? A ride to a Concentrtation Camp.

Q:What did the goat die? A: I dont know everything dies

Why couldn't the 10-year-old go to the moon? Because it's the Moo-oo-ooo... no you can't come!

A man goes to a Korean-owned dry cleaner to pick up his suits. They were impeccably cleaned at a reasonable rate.

Why did The chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

Wanna here a funny joke? Doug.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

a Squirrl climded a tree to get a nut

Starter clothing

Have you ever heard of Yoda? From 'Attack of the Clones'?

Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

What did the girl say when the boy asked her out? Yes.

Who's white and tries his best? Steve Nash

Knock knock It's open

Excuse me sir, you wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?

how do you know a chinese person has been in your house? #1 your homework is done #2 your computer is upgraded #3 when you get home there still pulling out of your driveway

what do you call a retarded italian Niko

What's worse then ten dead babies being nailed to a tree? Being the one to take them down.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 had 3 testicles

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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