Where is my tractor?

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Halo < COD

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What's better than a worm in your apple? No worms in your apple.

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What gas station can u make a Kwick trip at? Kwick trip

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What did the cheerleader get on Holloween? Raped.

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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What did the cancer patient say after the little boy told him a funny joke? I'm dying

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

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Yo' Mama so nice that she donated a kidney and saved a life

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

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Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

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"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

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Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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What happened to the peanut who went to NYC? Nothing because he was eaten on the plane

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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What do you call a group of white guys playing basketball in Philadelphia? Actually, that already seems like a pretty good summary of the situation.

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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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What do you get if you cross a banana, a mango, and an apple? A smoothie

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Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

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Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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