Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

Why did the baby die? Abortion

What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

why did summer hit the child because the child is jackson

Scientist 1: "What's your research paper about?" Scientist 2: "Homosexuality in fruit bats." Scientists 3, 4 & 5: "AHAHAHAHA LOL WUT"

Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

A black man walks into a bar with a parot on his shoulder. The bartender says "Hey you can't bring that in here!" The Parot replies "Sorry i'll have him wait outside."

Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

you want to hear a joke? sure... too bad

What's black and white and read all over? A zebra family that was just murdered by African poachers.

why did the fox jump over the pen ? it was tuesday

How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

what happens during a climax apples

The internet is the most terrible fucking place in existence.

Why do they censor everything on here? Because **** **** ******* *** ***** *****.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Pour it.

What's the difference between an elephant and a toaster. A lot of things.

What happened when the man rubbed the magical lamp? Nothing.

What's green and gets people high? A green helicopter

Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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