What is the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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How did the asian woman's car get totaled She was hit by a drunk driver

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What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running from its imminent death. It was being chased by a dog with a shark's head and chainsaws for legs. It was only delaying the inevitable.

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Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mothers funeral.

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What is Freddie Mercury's favorite planet? Earth.

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Why is Justin Bieber gay? He prefers the companionship of homosexual relationship to that of a heterosexual one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

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How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

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A black man, a Jew, and a homosexual are at a bar together. They drink for a few hours, during which time they catch up with each other and share stories, as it has been some time since the three of them have seen each other. After they are done drinking, they call a friend, who comes to pick them up and take them home. What a fine example of drinking responsibly.

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Q: What did the latino kid get for christmas? A; Nothing because he died two days before

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What's chris benoit doing? Just hangin in the gym

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

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What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

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"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

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roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Yes.

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Why did the Nazi shoot the Jew in the head? Because he was a Jew. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why didn't the pro-choice, pregnant woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

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Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops