A mushroom walks into a bard and the bartender admonishes him and tells him to leave. The mushroom says "Aw, c'mon...you stupid jerk!"

Who am I? Your name is Harvey Jackson. Let's get you dressed so we can go downstairs for dinner. Nurse Holland will be helping you in a few moments.

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob Who? Bob the human.........

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qg6AkhIYVs

What do people in Asia do for black history month? Nothing, black history month is an American thing.

What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun.

roses are red violets are blue oranges are......

Wy was the lamp crying, because his mother turned into mashed potatoes.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue A Face Like Yours Belongs In The ZOO. :o

Once my grandpa said: Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I said: No. Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I unplugged his life support.?

Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

I like to eat people

what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

Why couldnt the boy lick his elbows? Because he lost his arms after he was violently beaten by his drunk father with a bat.

A Priest and A Rabbi Walk Into The Bar. Ouch.

What's worse than 1,000 babies stapled to 1,000 trees? 1001 babies stapled to 1001 trees.

What are the four season of Canada? Cold, cold, cold and road work.

I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

Juggling lions and breast feeding.

What did the young boy get for christmas? Parental divorce

What did the Lumberjack say before cutting down the tree? Nothing, it's his job.

If 1 + 2 = 3 Then, what does 2 + 1 equal? It equals 3 due to the fact that reversing the order of numbers does not change the outcome of the equation :D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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