Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

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why couldent Hellen Keller drive? Because shes a woman.

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What's worse than your family dying in a fire? Nothing, that really sucks.

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What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

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What do you call a pakistani with a backpack on a plane? A passenger with ordinary hand luggage

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how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

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How do you baby sit a black child? Entertain him with stimulating games to help with his cognitive growth.

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"Media Zombies" Sounds like the Nero I remember.

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Why are hookers and babies so alike? You can have sex with both.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

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What's the difference between George Washington and Wiz Khalifa? George Washington died many years ago.

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Whats big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a pine tree? A refrigerator

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Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

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What is Freddie Mercury's favorite planet? Earth.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Yes.

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Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice? She was making sure there was enough sugar in it in case her diabetic son was to have an attack.

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Hi.

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What's black, white, green, red, blue, orange, gray, purple, and yellow? My art project.

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Whats worse than jackass 2.5? Jackass 3-D

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Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

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What did the cat say when you rub it's stomach? Nothing because felines don't have the needed vocal organs to speak, and probaly wouldn't know english do to the size of there brain.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? scream in her ear.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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