What is the difference between assault and aggravated assault? Aggravated assault is aggravated, whereas assault is aggravated.

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im a straight dude and all the gay dudes at school make fun of me oh wait i wrote that backwards

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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See now that is confident and down to earth, reasonable, and all the etc etc`s, so what would you like me to fill them in with? Joking aside, you are smart, funny, you take a beating (sorry that`s today`s new low point, I have never hit a woman and never will, sure I punched down the GigaLesb when she lifted me up and my spine started making cracking noises, but that does not technically count as a woman). You are sweet, you are cute, you are funny, you are hot hot hot (hattrick see?), and yeah yeah if you want me to prove to people here that we know each other, sure, I met you once like 15 years ago? You kinda adored me, I could not take my eyes of yours (oh yeah, you got adorable eyes sure), and... You got huge breasts (Tits are more like those hanging you know what I mean) Sigh sometimes a boy wonders what he is doing with his life, he falls for the strangest girls... ...AND THEN SAID BOY FINDS HIMSELF BROKEN IN TWINE BY ME!

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why can't Hellen Keller hear? she is deaf.

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What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

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What did the fish say when it hit the wall? "Dam."

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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Q: What did Santa give the little boy for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's not real

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What do a white dog and a black dog have in common? They're both white...except for the black one

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i'm not gay

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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What's the difference between a cake and Jews? A cake comes out of the oven.

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so a kangaroo a piece of cake and a whale are all doing... ...nothing they would not hang out together

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Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: Boobees

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Why did the tomato blush? Because it began to ripen.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bicycle? ( I don't know. ) You're so racist.

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Q: Why don't gingers have souls? A:Ginger is a root that consumed whole as a delicacy, medicine, or spice. Why would it have a soul?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Pokemon pencil!!! A Pokemon pencil who? I just found a Pokemon pencil next to my computer when I was playing pokemon!!! LMFAO!

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Why couldn't the young girl play outside with her friends? She was bed ridden with terminal cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a joke.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a poodle? A satisfied elephant and a dead poodle.

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Why did little jennifer shit herself? Because she fell over.

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hi to the world fromthe world

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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