Q:what do you call a black man in a wheel chair? A: a war veteran who accidentally stepped on a land mine while trying to protect his country.

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Your time.

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A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

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What's longer then Hitlers gas bill Chris Browns Penis

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What happen to the guy who didn't breathe A. He died

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No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

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Doctor doctor, I came here as quickly as possible, it was just the nearest place I could find. My dog he... he's panting and bleeding and I don't know what to do I think he's dying and I just want him to hold on... Please... Well then go to a vet you stupid shit.

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Why wasn't the boy at his basketball game? - Because he, his twin brother, and pregnant mother all died in a fatal car accident involving a train on the way their.

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

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What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

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Fire extinguishers are sexy.

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How old are you? 20

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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why am i on this site? cause its funny

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Whats worse than finding bubba in your house? Getting raped by a rabid racoon..

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Why couldn't the girl brush her hair? Because she had leukemia

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Republicans

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What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

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Roses are red Violets are fin I'll be the 6 You be the 9

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Wieners? A: Nothing. your last name is a male sex organ

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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