A child with cancer grows up.

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Two penguins were taking a bath. One said "pass the soap." The second penguin replied, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?"

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what did eminem say to dr.dre? nothing u idoits dr.dres dead he is locked in my basement

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Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

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Your mother is so old that she is dead.

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How do you kill half the population of Mexico? A preemptive nuclear strike.

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A man walked into a bar. He ended up in the hospital being treated for a concussion.

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What requires lots of rubbing, dirty pictures, and leaves you happy for a little bit, but then you realize you're sad and lonely? A minimum wage job where you clean pictures.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The horse, being unable to understand the barman, breaks a table and shits on the floor.

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What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey. I'm colour blind, It's a very depressing situation.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Ching Chong Bing Bong.. Yoyao? Dat U?

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What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

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No. Yes.

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Three blokes walk into a bar. I'm british.

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Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

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Q: why id the bird fly away from the boy? A: cuz he was scared

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Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

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Why couldn't the man speak any English? Because not everyone can.

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What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the situation -Tag

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What does ms colot like to eat? Pants

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops