A guy walks into a bar. The universe instantly shatters around him under the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through the void amongst the shards of his broken reality. This is the worst joke ever.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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Do you like flowers NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOW GET ME A COKE! And a pizza

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Why did the blond do so horribly on the SAT's? She was pulled outside halfway through her testing session by the school janitor who molested and murdered her in the bathroom.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? he wanted to.

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hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why was the girl stupid? She didn't pay attention in school because everyone was making fun of her blonde hair.

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Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

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knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

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William Wright. 8 perry street Answer-Gay

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2 people with ADD are playing baseball. One of them pitches to the other guy and the other guy swings his arms around, misses, then gets hit by a baseball bat. The batter then realized he was the pitcher and the other guy has gone off chasing after a bird that just flew by.

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

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Your mamma is so fat that she went on a diet.

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What do you call a black man working for Bank of America? A successful individual.

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How do you kill half the population of Mexico? A preemptive nuclear strike.

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Q.What did the muffin say when the other muffin said, "How ya doin'?" A."HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one is quite sure because technology is not advanced enough for humans to converse with chickens.

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Why did the man have blood on his finger? Because he popped a pimple

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Why did the zombie go to school? Zombies do not exist and certainly do not go to school.

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You are what you eat, so... Can we not talk about this? Cause for me it's recently been sort of sexual. ... How can it be ?.... Ohhhh, dude, that's disgusting...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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