- Anti Joke

What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

Why didn't the blonde go to the party? Her depression finally got the best of her and she shot herself

What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

terry stockton is straight

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. No Answer The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

Penis.

Watch this summer, as General Jack Ryu, attempts to fight his way across the jungle only known as "The streets" as he seeks to save Mary.Bison from the evil clutches of Master Jamie Ken in this epic written trailer! Jack Ryu: So we are brothers? Jamie Ken: No, I am your failed clone! I spontaneously begin burning from me feet and hands! WHHHHHHYYYY WAS I NOT THE CHOOOOOSEN ONE!!!!!! Mary B: Ryu... He is the fifth! THE FIFTH HAS ARRIVED! Jim "Dan" Daniels: Yes certainly, it is well within my scientific genius to create the fifth, yet my former associate Bob Sagat lost an eye in an explosion... CAN JACK RYU SAVE THE WORLD FROM THE MOST DEVASTATING BOMB IN THE UNIVERSE: THE AKUMA BEFORE JAMIE KEN UNLEASHES IT? CAN JACK RYU... FIGHT TROUGH THE STREETS... AND LIVE UP TO THE FIFTH AND SAVE MARY BISON? ALL DEPENDS IF HE CAN CONTROL HIS INNER CHUN LI! STREET FIGHTER V: rEVOLUTION

What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Penis... Okay...

What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

Hgiugsf s8dyfgc sdyhgd©•øˆ????ª•†®???ßßs cdiug dvyg 34t5 fd87 vrry utgg erug 46 5gtyrue fVTU? Tree.

Whats worse than HIV? AIDS

What is the different between a blonde and a rock? nothing.

A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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