What is the funny thing about suicide? nothing...

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What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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Chuck norris eats nails for breakfast. This is most likely the cause of his bleeding stomach and acid reflux.

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Why was the T-Rex always sad? He couldn't clap his hands.

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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

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So did you hear what happened to the deaf guy? He didn't either

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So. The gays. ...

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Q: Why was 2 afraid of 3? A: Cause 3 4 5!

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Once, one man had a horse. And the horse had nothing against it

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How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a serious alcohol problem that gave him violent tendencies.

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What's the difference between George Washington and Wiz Khalifa? George Washington died many years ago.

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What do you call 6 dead people on your front lawn? A mass murder

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Knock knock Who's there? Sergeant Sergeant who? Sergeant John Clancy. I regret to inform you that Billy your son has just unfortunately been killed in the electronic fan factory in which he works.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None, now stop hallutinating about wood chuck.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. The muffins do not talk or move, because they not living.

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whats worse than stubbing your toe? getting a vanarial disease and going insane

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Thanks

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

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why dont black people go on cruises? there not falling for that one again

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Knock knock Who's there Your son and his vagina.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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