roses are red facebook is blue no mutual friends who the heck are you

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Q: What is harder than cleaning off baby bloodstains off a wall? A: Cleaning multiple baby blood stains off a wall.

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S: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? P: They can chuck wood.

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A Priest in a Rabbi walk into a bar. They talk about religion.

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What did the hobo find on the ground? A dirty nipple. ~Logan F.

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why did billy drop his ice cream? he got hit by a plane that a loaf of bread was driving

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Why didn't the firefighter put out the fire? Because he wasn't a very good firefighter.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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What's the difference between anti jokes and Charlie Sheen? Nothing. Their both stupid

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whats funny ? not you i am telling the joke around here

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This is not a joke.

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Why did spongebob eat Patrick Because he was hungry

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Seeing your mom dance

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A Mexican, A Caucasian and An African American walk into a bar. Suddenly, a rival of the African American's pulls up in a used Chevrolet and shoots him 6 times with a semi-automatic handgun. The Mexican and Caucasian are distraught and call 911 immediately. The rival is later arrested and found guilty of murder in the first degree by a jury of his peers. Less than 6 months later, the bar is closed due to the negative stigma surrounding the shooting. Urban life is a harrowing and tough experience that most outsiders will never fully understand.

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's dead

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What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

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Why did Lil wayne decide to be a rapper? Because he would earn a very large amount of money and fame.

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What did the hammer say to the drill? Nothing, they don't talk stupid.

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There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were all of equal intelligence.

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How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? Because it wanted to be a monkey? Why did the John fall out of the tree? Because he has no arms and legs because he suffers from a severe case of lepracy. Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by three monkeys, a fridge and a boy with no limbs.

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anti jokes

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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knock knock WUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!!!! WUUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!! WUUUUUZZZZUU......

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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