-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Traveling Salesman.

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Get in the Batmobile.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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Whats an Anti-Joke? Funny

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Anti jokes gives me cold sores

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A man met a genie that granted him three wishes. I wish I could fly. The genie gave him a plane ticket. No, I want to really fly for real! The genie put him inside a plane. Okay, I wish I was unable to die then! The genie killed him. Moral: Not every story needs to make a fucking sense.

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Q: How many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 million and 1

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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7

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Why couldn't the 1 year old talk? It's a 1 year old, idiot, it can't!

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Kenneth kaniff takes his hat off then he meets cosmic panda with kevin the zebra because chuck norris ate a chili pepper.

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i love huge wieners.

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Two Haitians walk into a bar and it collapses

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How do you turn a broken skateboard into a gleaming Rolls Royce? With magic.

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Your so dumb, you didn't notice I should have used you're. Don't lie

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You can buy me a rose, and if I love roses, that rose would make me happy, you can buy me a large house by the ocean, but if I do not like big empty spaces and dislike the sea, it would make me sad. I am no longer sure what would make me happy, so no.

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100% of smokers die 100% of people die I am tied to a tree

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I walked down the street. I picked up a quarter. It was shiny. Then I walked to school. I finished school, so I walked home, did my homework, and went to bed. Lesson learned: quadratic formula

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save water shower with friends

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Yo mama's so fat that she takes too muc oh fuck it I'm stuffed Henri and Chaz

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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