Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

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A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't change anything.

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Take my wife- to the store.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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sarah taylor

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

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what is black and white and red all over.....a nun being murdered

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what did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur nothing dinosaurs can't talk

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What happened to the man that took too much viagra? His erection lasted longer than 4 hours, he's dead now

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Murder me once, shame on you.

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milk,eggs,butter,deodorant,chocolate syrup,chile powder,dildo,bacon

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why was the horse sad his wife had terminal cancer

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what's the difference between people and horses? people have two less legs.

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Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

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What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

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Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

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How does a gay take his pants off? Just like everybody else

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Q: What is the most common question among children? A: How are babies made?

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern pornography collections.

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so i turned on my radio.. so i could like listen to some tunes but like, it wasnt working and then like my best bud leaf was all like dude, thats a toaster.

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If you say woman really fast it sounds like make me a sandwich.

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Why did the man drink his own piss? Because he was Bear Grylls

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so one day i was getting my daughter artemisia ready for school and so i came in her room and got her pants and so i put it on and then i said did you grow during the summer really did you and then she said daddy both of my feet are stuck on one side of the leg

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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