Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

A guy walks into a bar. The universe instantly shatters around him under the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through the void amongst the shards of his broken reality. This is the worst joke ever.

whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

A man walked into a bar. He ended up in the hospital being treated for a concussion.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Shmellmype. Shmellmype who? HAHAHAHAHA (read out loud)

A child with cancer grows up.

How do you make time fly? You throw a clock off a building

your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

Me: Hey, Johnny! Do you see that Tree? Johnny: No. Me: Neither do I.

Q:Whats the difference between a black man and a park bench? A: A park bench can support a family.

No. Yes.

Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

Why did a duck cross the street? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

Asians are a lot like spongebob They're terrible at driving and good at karate.

What did the one legged girl do when her apartment caught on fire? She tried to hop to safety, but died of smoke inhalation.

Your momma is so old, she has lived a wonderful, long life and witness a lot of human achievement.

Why did the dude fall into a box? Because he was hit by a bus.

Two dogs walk into a room. What a fine example of two dogs walking into a room.

4 black people in a car drive of a cliff. the sad thing is there was a extra seat.

What's the difference between Hitler and shit? Shit has a shower in the morning.

Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt Getting stabbed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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