what did the ninja say to the watermelon nothing that was chuck norris's watermelon

thumb_up thumb_down +86

A guy walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

how do you make a baby cry? throw bricks at his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the black man buy a gun?? He enjoys hunting legally

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Don't look! I'm naked! No, seriously! I'm naked!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Dear diary, its day 230, the apple supply's are running low, the doctors are closing in, the dentists have been chanting "its time to go to the dentist" all day, I wont be able to hold them back much longer, help.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How Long Is A Chinaman's Name

thumb_up thumb_down -42

If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

thumb_up thumb_down -102

Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

thumb_up thumb_down -158

7>6

thumb_up thumb_down +103

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Knock Knock Whos there? Me Me who? Oh sorry forgot you had alzheimers :/

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you make a clown sad? Throw a brick at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats white, and stinks of urine? nick griffin's toliet

thumb_up thumb_down -19

i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

thumb_up thumb_down -35

a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

thumb_up thumb_down -59

What happens when you swallow a battery? You turn into one.

thumb_up thumb_down -101

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman walk into a bar. they all wish me happy birthday bearing gifts. except there's no rabbi. or priest. or shaman. I'm not in a bar. I'm in my room. alone. i spent most of my birthdays that way.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats better than 1 dollar? 2 dollars.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops