Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought the second one would have ducked.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy Get in the van

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Johan showering. . . AWK

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Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

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A: What happened to the snake? B: It died

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Penis in a butthole. Consentual Sex.

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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Why are fat people fat? Because they like food.

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What's a ghost favourite colour? Ghosts don't exist.

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What do you get if you cross a black man with a sword? A dead black man

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Why the long face?" Unable to under stand English the horse shits on the floor and leaves

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What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

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-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

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Howmuch wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Anyone? I'm trying to settle a bet.

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why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

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What's the square root of 69? 8.3

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How did the cat die of indigestion? Indigestion

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How many Jews can fit in a VW Beetle? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and maybe one in the trunk, but that wouldn't be very comfortable.

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what's worse than finding out god isn't real? finding out he is

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What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

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-Knock Knock. -Come in.

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face. Why was the little girl sad? Because it was her frog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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