How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Im Really Stoned And you have met with a terrible fate haven't you?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's Brown and sticky? A stick!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the African do when he found out he was constipated? He ate a laxative and went to the toilet

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead. Q: Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? A: Because he was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Oh. So his name's Brandon.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

William Wright. 8 perry street Answer-Gay

thumb_up thumb_down +21

So there was this Afghan with a backpack on a train... he was going to work.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

wnba

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? They were tossing frisbee and accidentally threw it into their neighbors yard.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you wake up your friend in a reasonable manor? you beat the shit out of him

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why don't blind men skydive? Because it would be unwise for a man who can't see to be jumping out of planes, completely unaware of his surroundings.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the white comedian get booed off stage? Because his jokes were humorless and offensive.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What's long and brown? A: The unemployment line.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did a duck cross the street? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops