Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

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Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

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Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

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Roses are red-ish Violets are blue-ish If it weren't for Jesus we'd all be jewish

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knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

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How many prostitutes do I have to kill in order to get an erection? Three.

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

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A guy comes to a doctor and says: - Doctor, lately I'm having this dream where I kill my father and rape my mother. What does it mean? - Nothing.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

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I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

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Christopher Walken to a bar.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing Because she had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there... Not Susie Why did the plane crash Susie was flying it

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what colour is a frog green you idiot

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How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

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What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

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Me and my pet lion just took a trip to his homeland of africa. It is also worthwhile to note I'm a chronic liar.

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What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

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Potato.

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What do Ethiopian children do at night? Starve

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Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

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What do you call a black hitch-hiker? Stranded

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Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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