what long hard and in a tight hole? a penis in a vagina

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Listen Nero, lol "listen", anyway, you seem pretty quick to take the blame for my mistakes here, I mean sigh... ...I would never send anyone to harass anyone, but then again I should never allowed them to join in the first place, how bad is that eye doing by the way? I am deeply sorry, I never meant for anything like this to happen. I am eating as I write, I mean I am still scared, I would not blame you if you still keep burning anger towards me.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do you call a boomerang that never comes back? stick

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I know a black girl named beyonca.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How did Pikachu jump off of a 100 story building and survive? He's not real

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Kid goes to Band Camp and comes back distinctly better at the Trumpet.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the old man have only one foot? Sadley, the other one was shot off in World War II and life hasnt been the same for him since.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the Groom give to his Bride on their honeymoon? Herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I had a "What would jesus do bracelet" and some kid kicked me in the shin... As i was contemplating on what to do to him, i looked at the bracelet and remembered.... SO I SET HIM ON FIRE AND SENT HIM TO HELL!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the 15 year old girl not enjoy her taco? Because the man making her taco was kid napped and replaced with a female that forgot to put cheese on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why are Asians so smart? Because they study

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

asian, do math

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why can't Sean slam dunk cos he has no arms -•#21

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I have a crush on my dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

girl: Daddie, what's at the end of a rainbow? Dad: No sweetie, a rainbow is acually just an illusion constructed by the refraction of light white as it passes through a water particle in the stratophere. Acting as a prisom the particle will seperate the different components of light, ordering them by the rank of the light energy and the intencity of it's frequency and wavelength.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops