One day i had to piss. I went to the bathroom.

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Knock knock Whos there? FUS ROH DAH

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Black History Month

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What did the umpire yell to the flatulent player at bat? FOUL BOWEL!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sausage is brown, and so is my wife.

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Why did I get raped

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What did the prostitute say to the nun? It's nice to see you again, Sister.

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A military serviceman returns home from a tour of duty to find his wife in bed with another man. He feels betrayed and files for divorce, then later meets a more faithful woman with whom he has a more fulfilling relationship.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, sauce on apples.

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A Muslim walks out of a bar... Because he doesn't drink alcohol

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is your refrigerator running? yeah oh, ok. just making sure your food doesn't spoil

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Why did the monkey follow the tree? Because it was dead.

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What happens when you are a fat 37 year old virgin, with a small penis, poor bone structure, pale skin, a horrible personality, and no friends? You spend all night writing anti-jokes...will someone please like me?

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Wanna hear a joke? Obamacare.

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How do you get a clown off a swing Hit it with an axe.

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How big is kevins Dick? Idk ask his mom!

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Hey Nerochan, how high is your IQ?

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whats harder than watching a dog get hit by a bus? my boner..

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Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down

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Why did the homeless man get skin cancer Because he didn't have a home so the Suns rays had been directed towards him For 3 years and he was to poor to purchase Sun screen

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

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Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Boobs In The Third Grade? A. Because She's 21

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what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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