A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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knock knock, whos there? the repo man.

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sometimes josh roberts sees how many things he can get in his bumhole befor is starts to bleed.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, sauce on apples.

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What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Chickens live in farms, they don't cross roads.

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There are 263 birds on a fence, a farmer shot 1 how many are left? 0 the rest flew away.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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anti jokes

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how do you know your at a gay picnic. the hotdogs smell like shit.

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knock knock WUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!!!! WUUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!! WUUUUUZZZZUU......

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Wanna hear a joke? Obamacare.

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Roses are red hulk is green, I'd smash that ass, If you know what I mean !

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Knock knock Who's there? Rick Rick who? Your wife's boss. I regret to inform you that your wife has sustained a injury on the job and she is in intensive care... I also regret to inform you that your insurance doesn't cover the injury

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

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if she is old enough to bleed, she probably wears tampons.

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How big is kevins Dick? Idk ask his mom!

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Hey look! Where? Above you, get the rebound.

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What do you call 10,000 black men with their heads sticking out of the ground? Afro-turf

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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As for regarding the Win/Win/Win/sore ass kid comment below... Why not? There is too much Win in order to worry about some fucking soreass thats just gonna grow up to be a slut... RIGHT? Your friendly r*pist Neighborhood r*pist Moral: Man: "He or she who knows I am right, will be be the only one left" Btw, I am the Anti-God, what else can I be? You are the ones that killed Christ Ahahahahahaha! Political humor bonus because my satisfaction of owning you all and your entire screen. Are you Right Winged? Or wrong Winged?

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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what do you call a black man being hung from a tree? -prejudice

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what's faster than an asian on a bicylce on payday? many things

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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