What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

What did the joke writer with A.D.D say refrigerator

A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

A man was getting surgery on his knee and the surgeon accidentally left a knife in his leg. The man's leg was severely infected and he proceeded to die in the following weeks. His family will mourn this loss for years to come.

A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others dont

Chuck Norris can drive a car using just his hands and feet!

c+t+c?

What's the difference between Micheal Phelps and Adolf Hitler. Michael Phelps is an Olympic swimmer who has won many gold medals in the 2008 Olympics in swimming races and is considered to be one of the greatest swimmers ever. Adolf Hitler was a terrible man who was the leader of the Nazi party during the World Wars. He ordered to kill eight million Jews, causing what is called the Holocaust. He is considered one of the worst men in human history. Other immature people would say Micheal Phelps can finish races.

A black guy and Hispanic guy jump off the Empire State Building at the EXACT same time. Who dies first? Who cares?!

how do you drown a blonde? strategically place a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a swimming pool (or just a regular sticker because, quite honestly, they won't be able to tell the difference as the water fills their lungs)

Ask me if I am a truck. Are you a truck? No.

A schizophrenic man walks into a bar. He has split personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

I went to visit my friend last week (not a guy, guys as friends? Thats just gay, I mean you fuck all of your friends right?) And she was really happy and stuff right? I mean REALLY happy, and the poor thing was depressed for like 8-9 months or something. So I was like: ARE YOU HIGH RIGHT NOW? >:( She said: YEAH I AM HIGH ON LIFE! I looked down at the ground, it contained a full box full of syringes and needles! So I grabbed the whole thing and threw them out! So then I learned what Insulin was anyways. Ps: Depressed, pregnant... Not sure anymore, it was like two weeks ago or something.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. I didn't ask him.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An Astronaut.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 6 cheated on 7 with 9.. 6 is now a victim of domestic violence.

What's the difference between me and convicted pedophile? -The pedophile's been caught ;)

can i have a cookie no diabeto!

why did the poet kill the blackchicken? as a source of inspiration for his poultry

So what do you guys wanna do?? Anything, I still have cancer..

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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