Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

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what are you called if your really funny but you not smart? the class clown

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A man walks up to a dead baby. The baby is dead

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Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

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Hey

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what red black and white al over? a t.v I was kidding about the red part

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Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

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Robert supra not deep throwing kaleb law wrench

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How do you kill a 6'5 black man in a dark alley? Stab him 3 times in the appendix with a 12 inch blade.

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What do you call a mexican hopping over fences - A parkour Artist

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What did the liberian man say to the kid he just spat on? You have ebola. and probably aids.

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Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

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whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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So a disabled man walks into a bar...

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Why was danielle so fat? She can't help her bad genetics

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I see London, I see France, I am in an airplane on my way to Europe.

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

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Q: What is worse than bitting in to an apple and finding a worm? A: Bitting in to a worm and finding an apple.

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

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Gadaffi

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Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

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What's 1+1? Window! Just kidding it's 2.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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