why am i on this site? cause its funny

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Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

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Billy comes home from playing with his friend as he walks to his front yard he comes across his mother...she is dead on the floor his friend then says "im SO sorry your mom is dead but at least you still have your dad" Billy than replies "my mom is my dad" billy then is put into a foster home and spends years trying to recover from the fact that he is the freak offspring of a hermaphrodite

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Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm going to kill your family.

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knock knock who's there? rock rock who? rock on the ground, don't trip

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? Because 6 accused him of cannibalism

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What did the cowboy say to the skunk? You smell.

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What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

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what's the difference between people and horses? people have two less legs.

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What did the great political leader say in order to calm the riot. There were no definable words. He merely screamed as the riot swallowed him and tore him apart.

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I like to eat people

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, i was dropped on my head as a baby, 978e456293&*(^$%ZYI467z57967454^&4543^%$54#%^*44jffdGHFYI

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How can you put 2 elephants in a bottle without touching each other. You put an elephant between them.

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I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

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What's worse than 1,000 babies stapled to 1,000 trees? 1001 babies stapled to 1001 trees.

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knock knock. Who's There? Cancer.

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What does Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na equal? A lot of sodium

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

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Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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