(insert command here) Oh yeah, well I want world peace.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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hey guys check out my cool youtube video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivQ_bezJjK0

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Why did Riley cross the road? A: I lied he started to then proceeded to get hit by a bus filled with children causing them all to be scarred for life.

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Why did Thomas miss school? Because he was sick

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? NOT SALLYYYY

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Knock Knock Yes?

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A guy walks into a bar. The universe instantly shatters around him under the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through the void amongst the shards of his broken reality. This is the worst joke ever.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

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Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

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Why was the dog barking? No idea.

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What number comes after 29? 30.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? One is a sports car and the other is a baby that is not alive.

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how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

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What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

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Jim: Knock, knock? Tom: Who's there? Jim: You're. Tom: You're who? Jim: You're a retard. ............................ Tom: You're mean, like a hobbit...

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A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

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What is small, black, and loved by children? An oreo.

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Dave: Hey, Doug! How was your day? Doug: My mother is dead.

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Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

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What do you call a gay couple of kangaroos adopted baby A Joey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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