what do outgoing girls get on spring break? raped.

What's grey got white stripes and can't climb trees? Car park.

What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

What did Helen Keller say to a stranger at a party? I earned a Bachelor of Arts degree, wrote several books, traveled to over 39 countries, and was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, one of the United States' highest two civilian honors, from President Lyndon B. Johnson.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

What did the boy do when he was bored and broke? He took to the streets selling illicit drugs such as cocaine. Although dangerous, the rush from said danger solved his boredom problem. On top of this, there is a huge market for such substances and he was not broke for much longer.

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

I had a "What would jesus do bracelet" and some kid kicked me in the shin... As i was contemplating on what to do to him, i looked at the bracelet and remembered.... SO I SET HIM ON FIRE AND SENT HIM TO HELL!!!

Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

Are you a human?

Sharks have teeth, I have teeth, Therefore i am a cat.

Knock knock! Who's there? Elton. Elton who? Elton John

Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

What do you say the big head boy? Brush yo teeth

knock knock who's there? rock rock who? rock on the ground, don't trip

Knock Knock Who's there? I'm going to kill your family.

What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

Why did the chicken cross the road? ..... he didn't

What's worst than failing your test? AIDS

What do you call a pen sitting on a counter? A righting utensil not being currently used.

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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