What did the blind and deaf woman get for her birthday? Raped.

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mat: whats 2+2? emma: how long we lasted

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Why did Lil wayne decide to be a rapper? Because he would earn a very large amount of money and fame.

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Wheelchair high jump

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what happened to your gran you tell me

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What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

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What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? Mittens

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? Because it wanted to be a monkey? Why did the John fall out of the tree? Because he has no arms and legs because he suffers from a severe case of lepracy. Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by three monkeys, a fridge and a boy with no limbs.

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A man named Cecil walks into a bar. He then orders a drink.

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How do you make a bllind person cry? Slowly cut off their toes.

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Why didn't the black man pay child support? He had no children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road To get to the other side

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My Joke Is The Persons Below Me I I V

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Your mum so fat, she died of a heart attack

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What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

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I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

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Hey look! Where? Above you, get the rebound.

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How do you get a one armed man to fall out of a tree? Wave.

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What is the saddest episode on tv ever? The live broadcast of the World Trade Center being destroyed.

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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A man and a woman are alone, the man holds her down and says I'm going to rape you! The woman replies I'm not into that and leaves unharmed

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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what's faster than an asian on a bicylce on payday? many things

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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