Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

Knock knock. Who's there? John John who John

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

How do you wake up lady gaga? Set an alarm for an appropriate time

How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

Hearpin my durp

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a chevrolet? I've never been inside a chevrolet before...

why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings. whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 beestings

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come home from camp.

Why couldn't the blonde drive? Because she was 14, thus incapable of having a drivers license

What is the different between a blonde and a rock? nothing.

Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Im Really Stoned And you have met with a terrible fate haven't you?

why did the truck crash into a tree? cause staplers dont know how to drive

Why did the boy fall down the stairs Because I pushed him

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...