Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

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Yo mama's so fat she couldn't ride on roller coasters with you in Disney world. Sometimes you wish you could share more fond memories with her.

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A: ask me if I'm a truck. B: why? A: just ask me. B: are you a truck? A: no.

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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Cows go moo.

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Why couldn't Mike answer the phone on time? On his way to the phone he was shot and killed.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

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How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Check for footprints in the butter.

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7

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I am on a escalator.

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Why did the black man wear a coat, shirt, pants, and underwear on a rainy day? Because he didn't want to be naked.

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Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

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Q: Why didnt the irishman walk out of the bar? A: He died of severe alchoholism and had a heart attack and died istantly

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why was the lemon not feeling well? Because it had lemon aids.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing finding a worm in an apple is disgusting because worms are disgusting creature that shouldn't live in an apple

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What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

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What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

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What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from camp.

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Q: How many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 million and 1

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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A woman walked into a bar at least that is what she tells her friends about how she got a blackeye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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