"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

What did the baby with Downs syndrome say to the baby with cancer? Nothing, baby's can't talk

What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

what do you call a black man named mike

why did i fall? i got pushed!

Whats worse than 10 dead babies In a tub 10 and 1/2

A Boy went up to his dad and told him he was hungry. His dad then beat him to death.

Haikus are awesome but sometimes they don't make sense hippopotamus

What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

Knock knock. Who's there? Dr. Dr who? Dr Johnson. I'm afraid you have AIDS.

a guy walked into a bar and said "ow!"

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

why did the child go to hospital with 52 broken bones,lung and kidney failure,heart disease and cut off penis. because his mum threw a fridge at mikeanator_27

What does an Asian man, Black man, & a Hick all have in common with automatic weapons? The Asian is Vietnamese and fought in the Nam, The Black guy lives in the ghetto and was shot in a drive by, and the hick and his best friend got drunk and shot each other in the foot.

what did the doctor say to the woman? I have 3 testicles

What ruined the little boy's day? He drowned.

What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

women's rights.

Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them they die.

how do you fall off a building? you trip.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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