What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

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"Media Zombies" Sounds like the Nero I remember.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf.

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3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

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Hellen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it ERRMMMMM UAHHHHHHHH...

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What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

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An eyeball walks into a bar and the bartender asks him what he would like. The bartender promptly wakes up in jail because he was caught having a meth lab in his basement.

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How do you stop a skunk from smelling? Block its nose.

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knock knock who's there? no one, but I appreciate the fact you asked.

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How did the man with no arm and no legs get to the store? Well he certainly didn't walk.

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A jew go out of a bar

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Dear Board of education, so are we.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

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Q: Why did the koala fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

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what do you call a middle eastern man on a plane? a passenger.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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Q:why did the woman make a sandwitch. A: cause she is a woman

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Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

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Where's my tractor?

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So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nevermind.

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what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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