How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

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a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

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What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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why couldent Hellen Keller drive? Because shes a woman.

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Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

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Roses are red Violets are blue im a retard dictionary

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Want to hear a dead baby joke? Abortion

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Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

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What call a duck with no wings? A deformity.

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A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

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A woman walked into a bar at least that is what she tells her friends about how she got a blackeye.

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hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

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You are in England which has a law about not moving traffic when these idk some kinda swans cross the road. You see a fat woman in a car and she is waiting for the swans to cross the road and she can't drive the car else she would get in trouble by law. What do you do? Feed her

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Your mom is so fat that she is fat.

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What do you call an 8 foot anxious priest painted purple named harold? Harold.

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Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

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How do you confuse a black man? Paint him white.

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Q: What do you call a black girl with braces? A: A black and decker pecker wrecker

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how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

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Why cant Jesus play rugby? Cause he's nailed to a cross

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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