What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

What is your favorite joke? I like bar jokes. Okay knock knock Who's there? A bartender A bartender who? A bartender walks into a bar but before he went through the door, he decided to knock on the door because this lame joke is so random.

How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

I went to a hockey game and the strangest thing happened; 2 players got into a fight!

A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

What did the mute say to his friend? Nothing.

Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

Yo mama is so hot that she needed to lower the temperature

What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new home? No. Neither has he....

Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? the black baby is black

I ate a pancake for breakfast not

When life throws you melons you might be dyslexic.

Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

Charlie Sheen walks into a bar, he relapses.

what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...