Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

IF UR READING THIS EXPECTING A GOOD JOKE HERE GOES.... WHY DID THE CUP SAY HELLO GET IT ? I DONT

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

*knock knock "there's a door bell"

thumb_up thumb_down +68

knock knock who's there? a murder who? a murder who kills you and your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Which one is hardest?

thumb_up thumb_down +52

I have glasses but cannot see I have feet but cannot walk What am I? A riddle.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Boobs In The Third Grade? A. Because She's 21

thumb_up thumb_down +50

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

When I'm sad I cut myself... another slice of cheesecake.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Canada

thumb_up thumb_down +46

The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Nobody cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why do policemen wear belts? To hold up their pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops