What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

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"Doctor," I said while poking my head, "My head hurts!" I poked my knee. "My knee hurts, too!" Then I tried touching my arm. "OW! So does my arm!" I even tried poking my teeth. "OUCH! Even my teeth hurt! What will I do Doctor?" "That's easy," said the Doctor, "I'll fix your finger right away."

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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

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what does brb mean? ...be right back? ...ok hurry i need to know the answer.

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs? handicapt

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? The video game he really wanted.

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Two dogs walk into a room. What a fine example of two dogs walking into a room.

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Dear Chase. You are retarded Your jokes suck Violets are red jump off a bridge

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Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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A woman leaves the kitchen.

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John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

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How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head underwater for a long time.

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What do you call a wine-o? A Alco-colic.

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How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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a man is having trouble getting onto the internet on his home computer. so he he calls a computer technician to help him. \

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Why is 6 afriad of 7? because 7 killed 8 with a pistol and is now on a killing spree.

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What's worse than having a bad hair day? Vietnam.

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69

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Thanks

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guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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