KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I am pregnant And it's your baby

An Asian teenager bought his first gun, and proceeded to go hunting with his father in the wilderness.

What do you call an 8 foot anxious priest painted purple named harold? Harold.

Do you want to hear the best joke ever? Me too!

What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

why is black such a deprssing color because it symbolizes death

Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

Why cant Jesus play rugby? Cause he's nailed to a cross

I had a grammar lesson yesterday. I learned how to speak more good.

What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

What is brown and sticky? Poop

So horse walk into a bar. The barkeep says "Look horse. You cant be in Here. You're too big and you're going to hurt someone....Its just not gonna work out."

A. Hey.. B. Hi

Why didn't the boy buy his mom a gift for Christmas? He was killed by a drunk driver two years ago

A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Q: What do you give a woman with everything? Nothing. You own nothing to give.

Your mom is so old so will die soon.

I raped someone in my basement... ...Just Kidding!... ...I dont have a basement

I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

What happens when you play a country song backwards? Gibberish.

Comedy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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