An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had just been to their father's funeral, who was a Welshman.

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Who am I? Your name is Harvey Jackson. Let's get you dressed so we can go downstairs for dinner. Nurse Holland will be helping you in a few moments.

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What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

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[] i have read and agree to the terms of service Nope

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

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What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

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Once my grandpa said: Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I said: No. Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I unplugged his life support.?

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Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

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Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

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What did the Ethiopian get for christmas? Hepatitis B.

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hi

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Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

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A Priest and A Rabbi Walk Into The Bar. Ouch.

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A Japanese woman walks into a Korean deli, and asks the Korean man if she can buy some groceries. They are able to get past their cultural differences, and share their favorite recipes.

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two men are having a conversation a third man walks what does he do? patiently waits as to not seem rude.

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What do you call a guy who makes jokes about a girl being in the kitchen? Single.

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

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What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

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How do you crash an airplane? By not knowing how to fly it.

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What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

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whats stupid and gay all of my friends

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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