Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

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How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being herded into a slaughter house to be killed, then packaged and shipped out to restaurant venders all across the country.

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whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

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Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

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One day I was hungry. I ate. I wasn't hungry anymore. Penis.

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why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

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Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

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what's worse than a kitten scratching your arm? A dead baby scratching your arm...

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This joke isnt funny.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, hes Jewish.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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KKK

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What did the Lumberjack say before cutting down the tree? Nothing, it's his job.

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what's brown and sticky? A stick!

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Why couldnt the boy lick his elbows? Because he lost his arms after he was violently beaten by his drunk father with a bat.

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A man got a promotion at work. Now he makes more money.

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Rob Rob! I haven't seen you in ages come on in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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