How do you get them out? Tortilla chips

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imagine a world without santa ill make it easy, lookout the window

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

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Why didn't the lactose intolerant man get a drink at the bar? He was the designated driver.

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Q:whats yellow and flys through walls A:A magical Banana

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A small boy called peter got stuck up a tree, a man walks past and said "how did you get up there?" peter replies "i fell"

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Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

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whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

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Roses are red Violets are? blue I'm going to rape you in the ass with a rake.

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roses are red violets are blue i have deep vein thrombosis .... perpendicular albatross

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Moral Man Solid V: The Pain Phantom.

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and a black person? Ones fun to hit with a baseball bat, and ones a watermelon.

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why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having an apple at all. Yet only worms to eat, such as the the poverty stricken citizens of Ethiopia.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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A gay man walks into a bar has a few drinks then goes home without being recognized as a homosexual.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

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What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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