What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

Why did the family go to Mexico? Because they were deported

What does a human have in common with a tree?? You can cut a humans leg of and count the....oh wait

Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

There was a peice of lasagna. He knew he tasted great. So he constantly feared for his life.

Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

Women's Sports

Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

man: honey im home woman: john im pregnant man: but i have a low sperm count! this is a miracle! woman: its not your baby its steves from the store man:but he's mexican! woman: i know.....i need an abortion. {lol racism}

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

What did the two eggs in the frying pan say to each other? Nothing, their eggs.

There was once a joke without a proper ending and so

what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

Q:Why did the man get hit by the car? A:He was standing on the road.. ;DDD

Some dude and his son are driving to school. They get into a car accident so the have to go the the hospital. But when the doctor comes in, the doctor says "I can't oporate on this boy! He's my son!" Who's the doctor? His Mom.

A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

What did the white guy say to the black guy wearing a black T-shirt? That's a very nice shirt.

What do you call to guys who gave gave each other HIV? Blood-Brothers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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