A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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whats brown? poop.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had alopecia.

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What does Batman say to scare Robin? Don't make me get the bat!

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whats water and frozen? an ice cube

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Terrance was going to clean his room but then he got high, do you know why? because terrance is addicted to illicit street drugs and should seek medical help.

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Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

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What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

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A guy went to a haunted house on Friday the thirteenth… it gave him a small fright and he continued on with his day

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How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

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How did the kid drop his ice he got hit by a train Griffin Cholette

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Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

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what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

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Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

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Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

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What did the bartender say to the bugatti owner? "Don't drink and drive"

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The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

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Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

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There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

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Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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