roses are black violets are too im colorblind how about you

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What's naughty and rhymes with CORN? Naughty corn.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

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Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

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how do you get a black guy out of a tree? ask himnicely and if he doesn't promptly call the fire department

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What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

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Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

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What do you call a man with no heart? Dead.

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What do you call a person who is 6 feet under? Lost.

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Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

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What did the Groom give to his Bride on their honeymoon? Herpes.

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths, thus he suffered survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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Why was Sally a bad driver? Because she rarely signals and never checked her blind spots.

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-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? -Dog shit.

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Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

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why was the man gay? because he likes men.

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

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What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

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I have a crush on my dad.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

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Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

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Do Minnesotans have accents? Oh ya, you betchya.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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