What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

What did Helen Keller say to a stranger at a party? I earned a Bachelor of Arts degree, wrote several books, traveled to over 39 countries, and was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, one of the United States' highest two civilian honors, from President Lyndon B. Johnson.

Why did the fat guy get a gun? Because he was tired of all the fat jokes...

What did the Black guy say to the White Rapper? I really like your music.

Im Jackson Sinclair and Me and Carter Weeks-69;)

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

Why can't Kevin run with scissors? Because he killed himself.

What has wings and flies at night? A black man with wings

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Alzheimer's ... Roses are Red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's (continues)

well the duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man, running the stand "quack" then went on its way

What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

What do you call a guy who makes jokes about a girl being in the kitchen? Single.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay man's house. Knock knock... Who's there? The Chicken

A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

Wats a joke?

Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

Knock Knock... Who's there... .....................

Do you have a curfew? No its saturday!

Do you really want to know what i shit? Poo

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

kiss me?

Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators come in an assortment of colors

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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