a man walks into a bar it hurt

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Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, "You man the guns, i'll drive."

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What is the difference between Charlie Sheen and Michael Jackson? One is dead, one is not.

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How do you mess with Helen Keller? Move all the furniture in her room.

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John has 38 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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A muslim walked into a bar. Then he walked out because he had made a wrong turn.

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Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

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What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

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Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

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hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

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If a tree falls in the forest does a woman hear it? Probably, but the real question is why is there a tree in the kitchen?

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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Q: Why did the Klansman go up to acclaimed rapper and television star, Flavor Flav, and say "Do you know what time it is, boy?" A: Because his trademark "bling" seems to be an actual functioning time piece. Q2: Why did that same Klansmen brutally murder Flavor Flav after he learned it was 5:46 in the pm? A2: Becasue Flavor Flav is black and that's kinda what you're expected to do in the Klan...

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blind man walks into a . . . .. .

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My name is never spelt right so its all good

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What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

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Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

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Q: how do u piss off a plumber? A: kill his whole family

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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Six million.

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What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? One is easier to unload with a pitchfork.

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whose better then Sarah, Georgia and ellie NO ONE!!!!

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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